What typeface do fish fear most? Gill Sans!
Yo mama’s so old, she refers to Century as Futura.
Bob: Why the long face, Helvetica Compressed?
Helvetica Compressed: Remember that Bembo from the club last night? She was the Open Type. She let me kiss her and I contracted Monotype!
Bob: Oh man, that sounds horrible! At least you're not your cousin, Helvetica STD.
Good for a Monday morning giggle!